Doomed...

I was doomed to gray early.
Both my sisters and my father grayed early and I have obviously been no exception.
My hair started turning shades of silver in my early 20s.
I tried to embrace it at first but then, got sucked into the whole dye thing and now I don't want to quit.
For instance, it's been almost 3 months since I last refreshed my natural color.
I now have so many gray hairs on the top of my head that sometimes even the dog doesn't recognize me.
People ask to see my ID and have to look twice.
My kids have called me 'Nana' by mistake.
Enough is enough.
So, yesterday I sat indian-style on the counter in front of our bathroom mirror plucking out gray hairs with a pair of tweezers...all while whispering through clinched teeth a very avid "Die!" to each individual hair. (I was trying to warn all the others to pay attention by making an example out of the naughty follicles. If they don't get with the program I might just go crazy enough to pull a Britney stunt).
I did this for about 30 minutes. That is, until Mr. Simpleton came in, quizzically pondering the situation then, bravely asked "What are you doing?"
"Oh nothing..." I said. "...just die-ing my hair."